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Wes Richards posted an update 8 years, 1 month ago
Yesterday was a little rough for me. I was stuck in resentment and victim consciousness. Avoided connecting with people. Wanted to isolate and stay away from media, social or otherwise. And all the while I was aware of my victim mindset and unable or unwilling to make a different choice from the one I was making to be a victim.
What positive intention were you getting from being in victim consciousness, Wes? Thanks for sharing your process with us.
I was trying to be heard by my wife. She still didn’t hear what I was saying which kept me stuck in my role as a victim. Eventually we both let the issue go by repressing it so we can both live in relative peace until the next time it comes up. I guess the intention is to evoke change in my wife and our relationship. There’s no empowering way of doing this that I’m aware of, or if there is, I already tried it and it failed.
Wes, wondering if you would play along. Prompt today is to take ownership. In this situation, what patterns can you own? I really hear that you want things to be different or better between the two of you. I hear some patterns of victim consciousness, not being heard and repression. Any others? Thanks for sharing this. You know I appreciate your authenticity very much.
I can own that I have a disenpowering pattern of walking on eggshells around my wife. I also own my unwillingness to not react to her triggers. I acknowledge my pattern of reacting to her triggerd from a place of fear, resentment and defensiveness/self preservation. I own that I don’t show up for her the way she wants me to because she’s unwilling to show up for me the way I want. I own that I repress the anger I’ve been feeling for years on end out of fear of feeling and expressing it. I also acknowledge that if, as I tell her, it feels that we speak two different languages, I’m not hearing her either.
Thank you for sharing your ownership.